


A journey

by jess0120390101



Category: GOT7, minor - Fandom, 방탄소년단 | Bangtan Boys | BTS
Genre: Alternate Universe - College/University, Alternate Universe - High School, Ambiguous/Open Ending, Bisexual Male Character, Bisexuality, Coming Out, Internalized Homophobia, M/M, Sad, Slice of Life, tiny bit
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-09-25
Updated: 2016-09-25
Packaged: 2018-08-17 04:25:34
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,305
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8130325
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/jess0120390101/pseuds/jess0120390101
Summary: Min Yoongi, a university student, looks back on and writes about figuring out his sexuality and falling for a friend.





	

**Author's Note:**

> I wrote the story from my own experience about a year ago and now I decided I wanted to make it into a BTS story! I hope you like it and please comment!  
>  ""I put double quotation marks around internal thoughts.""

Dear anyone,

I don't know how many people will read this, but my name is Min Yoongi and I am bisexual. You might see this and think why do I care a bunch of people are. Why would I read this dumb young guys story. I get that! I probably would have the same thoughts, but I am hoping this will help me organize my thoughts.

 

It all started about 5 years ago when I was a Freshman in high school. My friends Taehyung, Jimin and I were going to hang out for the day. Jimin and I were not necessarily friends at that point, but since we both were friends with Taehyung we were going to hang out. In all honesty I didn’t like Jimin at all and from what I have learned recently the feeling had been mutual. That’s why when Jimin got to my house first I was a little nervous. I thought ""What can I do that won’t make it awkward? Oh I remember he likes Glee and I like that too. I’ll put an episode on.""

I turn the episode on and we talk about the characters that both of us like. “My favorite is Kurt!” said I.

“Mine is Rachel I love how positive she is!” said Jimin.

The episode that happened to be on is the one in which Kurt dances to Single Ladies. Jimin goes to tell me that he knows the whole dance. My little sister was down there too so she asked, “Jimin please do it!” I could care less whether I saw it or not I was just waiting for Taehyung to get there so this awkwardness will be over. Me being the nice person I am watches the dance, What is happening to me? Why is this making me feel like when I see Beyonce in a music video! He’s a guy! It must just be the dancing…. It is a kind of sexy dance.” The dance finishes, with me looking down at my phone for most of it, and my sister applauds and says,”Wow! That was amazing!

“Mmmhmm,” I unenthusiastically agree and thankfully Taehyung comes down and I can get my mind off it.

The next incident doesn’t happen for a few months because I avoided anything that would make me think that again. It’s the night of Jimin’s sixteenth birthday party and we are just hanging out a few friends and his family are there. Taehyung and I are sitting together because we don’t really talk to most of the people there and Jimin and his boyfriend Mark come over. We start talking and I can’t keep my eyes off of Mark’s low cut shirt. ""Wow he has nice collar bones! I’m only looking cause I’m jealous. I wish mine were that nice too."" Watching Mark also kept me from looking at Jimin and noticing how cute he looked. A few months later I started liking Jimin more than a friend. I just never realized that was the case for a long time.

The three of us started to hang out more often and by Junior year I started to accept that maybe I didn’t only just like girls and that boys might be attractive to. This realization was not easy during this time I tried to talk my brain into having crushes on any random girl, didn’t matter if he was nice or not. Eventually I accepted that this isn’t the worst thing I have double the chance of falling in love with someone. Despite my accepting that I was bisexual I was having a harder time accepting that I had a crush on Jimin.

It took me until the beginning of senior year to accept that. I finally had talked my brain into thinking that it’s ok to like a friend it happens all the time and it’s not like I want to act on it and I couldn’t anyway he is still dating Mark.

Two months after realizing this, I was at my locker getting ready for lunch when Taehyung comes up with Jimin. I could tell Jimin looked off and I wondered why, but didn’t ask. Jimin starts crying through this and Taehyung luckily was there to comfort him because I couldn’t do anything my heart was breaking seeing the person I liked hurt. Taehyung takes Jimin somewhere and later in the day I hear that Jimin and Mark had broken up.

The next day Jimin seemed sad, but okay. I was so confused because the fact that Jimin wasn’t dating anyone made me more confused about my feelings.

A couple more months went buy and it was almost the end of the school year and we were about to graduate I had talked myself into telling my friends I was bisexual, but every time I tried I chickened out. 

At this point we have graduated and it is the day of my graduation party. Jimin hadn’t talked to Taehyung or I for a week because Jimin had a new boyfriend who was visiting from Ohio. I was kind of angry when I heard he would be coming to my graduation party. I didn’t even invite him! Yes I didn’t want a relationship with Jimin, but it still hurts to see someone you like with somebody else. The graduation party is really fun after Jimin and his boyfriend left. I had a good time with my other friends and family.

A few days after Jay, Jimin’s boyfriend, has left. Taehyung isn’t around because he was on vacation and I could tell something was up with Jimin so our other friend Namjoon and I decided to take Jimin to Wendy’s. We were sitting in my car eating frosty’s when Jimin starts talking about missing Jay. This hurt me so bad to hear about this and I wanted to scream and say stop telling me about this, but I could tell how hurt Jimin was so I let him speak. I learned that night that my little crush might not have been a crush for awhile and i had fallen in love with Jimin.

It’s almost the end of the summer right before I was leaving for college and I was planning to tell my friends about me being bisexual, but that didn’t happen because there was only one time that last week when all of us hung out and I chickened out again. 

Now I am sitting in my dorm a few weeks into college and I see that line (an instant messaging service) has a private chat. I notice this and decide screw it I’m telling Taehyung it took about 15 minutes of me typing and retyping until I finally sent the message. Taehyung took it really well and this led me to decide to tell Namjoon. Namjoon also took it really well. I had also told both of them that I liked Jimin. I guess I waited another week until I finally got annoyed of Jimin not answering any of my texts and eventually said “Text me back! I need to talk to you!” I told him that I was bi and he were very happy and then I told him I had a crush on them before. They were ok with that. I never mentioned that I still liked them now or how long I had liked them.

Over time Jimin and I have slowly stopped texting and in January I decided that I shouldn’t keep hurting myself because of someone who doesn’t care about me. It’s not like Taehyung or Namjoon where friends with Jimin anymore either… he had cut them out too. Now I am trying to move on and I hope writing this will be like the sort of closure I need in order to move on from Jimin.

 

-Min Yoongi

**Author's Note:**

> Thanks for reading this far! Don't forget to comment!


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